• Looking for a family friendly place to have your meal?

  • Perhaps a place to sit and settle with your sweetling?

We ain’t it.

WELCOME TO THE CLUMSY KARAKUL

  • Mateus: Lavender Beds **Ward: 5 Plot: 48 **

  • ==Bi weekly Sundays & Fridays @ 8 - 10 pm Est ==

  • Your one stop shop for good food, great fights and fucking fantastic hunts. Rated M for maybe you shouldn’t talk so much shit with a punch-able face. Come on in, take a seat, we’ll treat you - uh, we’ll treat you alright.

  • The Clumsy Karakul offers plenty:

  • > Food - Sample our average cuisine!

  • ** > Brawls - Shit pit! Shit pit! Shit pit! **

  • **> Triple Triad - Heart of the cards! **

  • **> Excellent Service - Debatable! **

  • > Dm'd Hunts - see our discord for info!

IC Rules

  • Talk Shit, Get Hit.

  • Pet the Moogle's Belly.

  • No kids In this Dojo.

  • Respect our staff.

  • Respect the property.

OOC Rules

  • IC Actions = IC consequences.

  • Be Excellent to each other.

  • 18+ To Hang with us.

  • Respect our staff.

  • We are lore flexible.

CIGARS

  • Cigars - A rolled bundle of dried and fermented tobacco leaves made to be smoked. Comes in several flavors:

  • > Galago Mint

  • > Chocolate

  • > Rolandberry

  • > Rum

  • > Honey

  • > Vanilla

FOGWEED

  • Dried Fogweed - Slowly and carefully cured with fire shards and finely chopped, when smoked it has calming properties.

  • > Galago Mint

  • > Lowland Grape

  • > Rolandberry

  • > Apricot

  • > Golden Apple

  • > Vanilla

LEAVES

  • Tobacco Leaves - Processed leaves for when one wishes to roll their own cigar or stuff their own pipe.

  • > Aromatic fire-cured

  • > **Cavendish **

  • > Perique

  • > Corojo

  • > Criollo

  • > Latakia

Shit Pit

**The pit is accessible rain or shine. Tell a staff member so we can make sure you don't die. **We use The Grindstone's system, tried and true. Take a gander proper, ignorance of the rules does not excuse from following them. Nor will it stop us from disqualifying contestants. 3 hits win or after a 30 minute timer, whoever has the most points in that time wins. Should it be a draw, we'll go to sudden death. First point wins it.**Freeform Fights are more than welcome! We recommend players have predetermined parameters for free form fights such as who wins. For the curtsey of those who may wish to go next, please keep fights at 30 minutes max. Staff can time the fights for you and send reminders if need be. **

Xheila Olar

Owner of The Clumsy Karakul and Front of House manager. All questions, suggestions, concerns and complaints should go to her. Ask her about the parkour challenge. At. Your. Own. Risk.

STAFF

These are the people who officially work here.

***The Clumsy Karakul seeks to add more shenanigan friendly folk to our team, speak with Xheila Olar or Inalchi Hotgo if interested! ***

Inalchi Hotgo

We uh. We don't know. He's the Co Owner & Back of House Manager though so uh, there's that. Good luck ya'll. Challenge the man to a food eating contest! Iron Stomach challenge!

Zhao Diremite

** Part time Manager of the Shit Pit! Collector of the sharp shit! Full time badass! They'll fight, heck they might start it! We don't pull our punches here.**

Louder Steel

**CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! **

Fuyu Tetzcoal

**CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! CHEF! **

Imogen Malaguld

***The Clumsy Karakul seeks to add more shenanigan friendly folk to our team, speak with Xheila Olar or Inalchi Hotgo if interested! ***

Lakaera Riverthorn

Hostess with the spice, the spice that burns the soul. The spice so hot that you'll never be whole! Challenge her to a spice off! Milk is for wimps!

Rae'la Ijinn

Hostess and resident drinking champ. Legend(s) (yes plural) has it she challenged sailors to a drinking contest and is now their captain.

Affiliates

Want affiliated with The Clumsy Karakul? Reach out to Xheila Olar or Inalchi Hotgo